memories can be both rewarding and painful. there are good and bad memories. the bad memories, the ones we would like to forget, always find a way to creep into our mind's eye. for me the memories i would like to forget are centered around regret. regret for the mistakes i have made in the past. mistakes i would like to forget. yes i should move forward and learn from these mistakes for they make me who i am, but that doesn't stop them from entering my thoughts from time to time. why do memories pop in and out of our lives? of course there our triggers in every day life that spark memories, whether it be an event or a place. another question is: are we remembering the event or person, or are we remembering the emotion felt? or both?
so there are the negative memories, but there are also the positive ones too. i would endure all of my bad memories to recreate one of the good. the memories we never forget are the ones that make us laugh out loud, the ones that take us back, allow us to relive. like little helpful reminders that the present is special, that the present is what makes these memories.
either way memories are permanent markers in our mind that paint a picture of our lives; memories can never be taken away.
i have many wonderful memories, and a few bad. i remember my sister teaching me how to ride a bike in the backyard on an orange and black bicycle. i remember my dad baking cakes in the evening, i remember patiently waiting as he frosted them. i remember my mom labeling every crayon and pen for my sister and i to take to school. i remember the smell of my dad's wood shop. there are so many i have a feeling this will be a two part blog...
what are your favorite memories?
Monday, September 28, 2009
Sunday, September 27, 2009
jealousy
i often times find myself being jealous of someone or something. mostly someone. in particular ONE someone. the thing is i know i shouldn't be jealous of this person. i have alot to offer, etc., etc., blah, blah, blah. but i still am. i mentally compare myself to this person frequently. but what is it that i am jealous of? success, beauty, charisma, athleticism? yes, all of the above. i know that some of my jealousy issues have to do with my own self-esteem. the difficult part is that i know i shouldn't be jealous, i know i should value who i am and what i have to offer. I DO. but i still am envious.
jealousy, however, can be productive. using that fuel to fire. whether it be in a workout or anything else in life. is it human nature to be jealous?
jealousy, however, can be productive. using that fuel to fire. whether it be in a workout or anything else in life. is it human nature to be jealous?
Friday, September 25, 2009
friendship
as i think back at all the friends i have had over the past years i realize that they can be categorized into three types: true friends, acquaintances, and those who fall in between. i can honestly say that i would not trade my true friends for any of the others who fall into the other two categories. thus, i only have a couple of friends who i consider true.
but what makes someone a true friend? to me it is understanding, compatibility, laughter, trust, communication. my best friend and i have lived in different cities for most of our adult lives, but have managed to keep our friendship strong. i KNOW without a doubt that no matter how long between our conversations our next will pick up right where we left off. there aren't very many people that i would do anything for, infact i can count only two: my best friend and my sister. but i know they would do the same for me. perhaps that is the point, a mutual understanding that the other is there without question. i feel completely myself when i am with my best friend and we laugh like there is no tomorrow. i could go on and on about the reasons i love my true friends but i won't. instead i would like to hear your thoughts. what makes a true friend? what are the special qualities in your friends?
but what makes someone a true friend? to me it is understanding, compatibility, laughter, trust, communication. my best friend and i have lived in different cities for most of our adult lives, but have managed to keep our friendship strong. i KNOW without a doubt that no matter how long between our conversations our next will pick up right where we left off. there aren't very many people that i would do anything for, infact i can count only two: my best friend and my sister. but i know they would do the same for me. perhaps that is the point, a mutual understanding that the other is there without question. i feel completely myself when i am with my best friend and we laugh like there is no tomorrow. i could go on and on about the reasons i love my true friends but i won't. instead i would like to hear your thoughts. what makes a true friend? what are the special qualities in your friends?
Thursday, September 24, 2009
reading
note: this is my very first blog; although i was one of those crazed xanga fans and i do consider that more of a blog than the facebooks, myspaces, and twitters of the current time. also, i like to type in all lower case just for the ease of things, however the importance and stresses are still well noticable. here goes...
i just finished reading angels & demons by dan brown. i had initially started reading the book years ago, but for some reason or another stopped. i did read the da vinci code and thoroughly enjoyed it (more so than the movie). then i decided to read angels & demons again, perhaps because my significant other is reading brown's newest book, the lost symbol, so i felt compelled to catch up. the story is quite a controversial one: science vs. religion, specifically catholicism. this hits home for me as i am an appreciator of many religions, although i do not consider myself religious i have great respect for those who are. also i am a philosopher. yes i said it, a philosopher. someone who questions. but that is another story...
back to reading and angels & demons. the story also deals with the mysterious illuminati brotherhood, a group of scientists who were supposedly shunned by the church. the main character robert langdon goes on an illuminati quest of sorts through rome. the historical facts presented in this book are awe inspiring, such detailed accounts of ancient art work and symbology. i did not intend this to be a book review, but if you have read the book i would like to hear your opinions. and if not it is definitely worth checking out.
reading this book got me thinking about my reading habits in general, amongst other religious and philosophical questions. i used to be quite the reader growing up. i would spend summers reading quietly in my room, but as i got older the personal reading time dwindled to practically non-existant. perhaps as a result of majoring in one of the most reading intensive subjects: philosophy. now that i am out of school it seems only natural that i could fall into my old reading habits, i am hopeful that this is the case. reading is a wonderful habit and i admit i am jealous of those individuals who read regularly for pleasure.
it seems in this day and age emphasis on reading is fading. technology and computers are the wave of the present, even the task of reading has become digitalized. i am old fashioned in the sense that i enjoy physically reading a book from cover to cover, smelling the print on the pages. what do you think? how do you read? and why?
i just finished reading angels & demons by dan brown. i had initially started reading the book years ago, but for some reason or another stopped. i did read the da vinci code and thoroughly enjoyed it (more so than the movie). then i decided to read angels & demons again, perhaps because my significant other is reading brown's newest book, the lost symbol, so i felt compelled to catch up. the story is quite a controversial one: science vs. religion, specifically catholicism. this hits home for me as i am an appreciator of many religions, although i do not consider myself religious i have great respect for those who are. also i am a philosopher. yes i said it, a philosopher. someone who questions. but that is another story...
back to reading and angels & demons. the story also deals with the mysterious illuminati brotherhood, a group of scientists who were supposedly shunned by the church. the main character robert langdon goes on an illuminati quest of sorts through rome. the historical facts presented in this book are awe inspiring, such detailed accounts of ancient art work and symbology. i did not intend this to be a book review, but if you have read the book i would like to hear your opinions. and if not it is definitely worth checking out.
reading this book got me thinking about my reading habits in general, amongst other religious and philosophical questions. i used to be quite the reader growing up. i would spend summers reading quietly in my room, but as i got older the personal reading time dwindled to practically non-existant. perhaps as a result of majoring in one of the most reading intensive subjects: philosophy. now that i am out of school it seems only natural that i could fall into my old reading habits, i am hopeful that this is the case. reading is a wonderful habit and i admit i am jealous of those individuals who read regularly for pleasure.
it seems in this day and age emphasis on reading is fading. technology and computers are the wave of the present, even the task of reading has become digitalized. i am old fashioned in the sense that i enjoy physically reading a book from cover to cover, smelling the print on the pages. what do you think? how do you read? and why?
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